Monday, October 14, 2013

You're Not My Friend

"You're in a Facebook fight, aren't you Mom?"

"No. I am not."

"Yes you are! I can tell by how fast you're typing and your face looks mad."

The kid knows his mama. And I'm not too proud of myself right now.

For all the time and attention that I have devoted to Facebook you'd think I'd have more to show for it. You'd think me and FB would be great "friends". Instead I'm stuck in this horrible cycle where I delete my entire account in disgust only to log back on a few hours later... I need FB and I hate FB all at the same time. I have a problem.

I don't enjoy the void. You know, the what-do-I--do-with-this-blasted-smartphone-now void.

I miss the pictures of my cousin's sweet babies, and the terrific blogs my friends share, and the coupon alerts, and the recipes, and the homeschooling tips and pretty much knowing what's going on in everybody else's world....

While I'm only vaguely aware of what's going on in mine.

It's. Way. Past. Time. To. Quit.

I know it. I have to stop justifying it.

I see myself slipping into the ugly side of Facebook. Let me be honest, I'm already six feet under the ugly side. I've been cropping out laundry and dirty dishes for years, posting my highlights and thoughtful insights, all the while neglecting to share statuses like:

I checked FB this morning before the kids got up and didn't get off for more than hour. It's way past breakfast and nobody has eaten. #momoftheyear

On a hot date with husband but I'm more interested in sneaking a peak at FB. #moretruththanfiction

God has been moving in an amazing way within our family. The top of my blog reads, Living the life of our dreams.... and recently we have seen so much of that unfolding. We have had three precious children in our home through foster care respite. Each one of them unique and full of promise. Each one of them a survivor, in the truest sense. Last night I rocked a sweet baby boy to sleep for the fourth night in a row and I just sobbed. It's all so overwhelming. We have been respite for two different foster families and let me tell you, these parents are really super-heroes in street clothes. They haven't just opened their homes, they've given away their hearts. I feel honored to serve them.

So, I have to get this monkey off my back once and for all. I don't have room in this dream for all that Facebook drama.

FB, you are not my friend.



3 comments:

  1. Right there with ya sister. Praying for your family during this amazing time of your life! I can't wait to see what God has in store :)

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  2. Thanks for sharing! I have been having similar feelings about Facebook. You encourage me.

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